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Yo, listen up. Which job are you actually signing up for? You gotta pick one. Job one. You work two hours a day, from your bed. Your boss is literally your dog. You get unlimited pizza and energy drinks every single shift. No meetings, no alarms, and every Friday is automatically a paid day off. The only catch? You have to like and subscribe right now, or your boss finds out you have been slacking and fires you on the spot. Job two. Twelve hours a day, outside, in the freezing cold. Your coworke